A New Specialist, Breakfast Sandwiches, Beach Sunsets: My Weekly Gratitudes

Project 365, Day 222/365

My friends, today (Monday night), I sit with hope that tomorrow brings me a little closer to some answers. While I’ve never gone too deep into my body troubles here, what I will say is no one, not all the doctors or practitioners I’ve seen have been able to tell me what’s causing my ailments. But Tuesday, I’m seeing a new specialist, a fresh set of eyes and ears to hear me out. A part of me doesn’t want to get overly optimistic because I’ve been here before and got nowhere. But another part of me needs that hope. That maybe this person will see something someone else hasn’t. It’s impossible to know how to help yourself if you don’t know what’s actually happening. It’s like tinkering with a car’s engine, seeing no progress, when all the while, the issue was the alternator.

That’s not to say nothing has improved in the nearly year my body has felt foreign to me, I’ve been not myself, but it’s been far too long of hearing a bunch of I-don’t-knows. Maybe, just maybe, I can hear something else this time, something to lead me to progress. I’m grateful for the chance to talk to a new doctor, for the healthcare to seek out that opinion, as that privilege—which should be a right—is not afforded to too many in this country.

Here’s what else I’m thankful for today and this week:

I’m grateful for fresh opinions.

I’m grateful for unexpected niceties.

I’m grateful for sunsets at the beach (and spotting a pod of dolphins frolicking in the waves).

I’m grateful for breakfast sandwiches.

I’m grateful for weekends and rest.

I’m grateful for peaches and nectarines.

I’m grateful that I still get to work from home.

I’m grateful for a washer and dryer, so the only excuse I have for not having certain things to wear is my own laziness.

I’m grateful for new books to get lost in.

I’m grateful for an internet connection that lets me play games with my nephews, thousands of miles away.

I’m grateful for my cordless vacuum so that I can avoid backbreaking plugging in and out as I move through rooms.

I’m grateful for summer tomatoes (and burst tomato sauce that cooks up in 10 super speedy minutes).

I’m grateful for Charles.

I’m grateful for you.

See you tomorrow, FOAS.