I Gotta Know: Do You Talk To Yourself Outloud?

Project 365, Day 202/365

Slowly but surely, even though I swore growing up that it would *never* happen, I’m turning into my parents. My mother’s haphazardness, my father’s homebody tendencies. Heck, I even now find all kinds of mysterious bruises on my legs, which is something I would always call out on my mom’s body, annoyed like it was somehow her fault. It is what it is.

But today, I stood in the kitchen, heating up some lunch, in full-blown outward conversation with…myself. I can’t remember what I was talking about with me, but this is a regular occurrence. Growing up, I was always catching my dad talking out loud, and I’d ask “who are you talking to?” and his answer was always the same: “oh, myself.” He never made it seem like he thought it was a weird thing. Just very matter of fact. My dad was always chit-chatting with none other than himself, and I used to think it was so strange.

Of course, fast forward 20 years and I’m very much my father in that way. I regularly hear Charles say from across the apartment “did you just say something?” which makes me realize I’m doing it. It’s so second nature at this point that it doesn’t even phase me. I think it started when I lived by myself years ago. I’d say the things out loud that I wish I had said throughout the day to others, or run through conversations I knew I’d never actually have with someone. I’d talk myself through the things I needed to get done, convince myself to do them or talk myself into not doing them. Sometimes, when cooking, I’d talk through what I was doing, like I was on the Food Network on my own show. I mean look, when you live by yourself, it can get pretty quiet and lonely, okay?

None of this happened inside my head, like it used to. Nope, all out loud, as if someone else were there.

I don’t think I’ve ever once heard Charles talking to himself, at least not in recent memory. So it made me wonder, specifically today…how many other people do this?

For a minute, I wondered if it’s because I’m a writer. I’m constantly creating some sort of dialogue or writing in my head. It’s just a hop, skip and a jump from leaving my brain and coming out of my mouth. I am full of words that evidently are desperately always trying to exit my body in some way, either via my fingers or through my vocal cords.

Personally, I quite enjoy my own conversations. No one gets me quite like I get myself. No one listens to me quite like I listen to myself. But…is it weird?

So…I have to know: Do you talk to yourself out loud regularly? If so, what about?

Anyway, a short post today, but just a little something I was thinking about that I thought I’d poke you all about.

See you tomorrow, FOAS.